And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become……..
Life requires a lot from me….That voice within that hammers me negatively. It says, you’re no good at this or even, why didn’t I see it coming? You gotta be better, stronger….more, more and even more is required from me.
Stop
Seriously, changes, set backs, conflicts, losses or just plain living under stress, these all require a lot from me and usually take their toll. Suddenly I am blaming others, not being my authentic self, gossiping or perhaps being overly self-critical.
I Say Stop!
Without even thinking it through, I naturally want to hide until this all goes away or better yet, I quit!. I get so embarrassed that this is actually happening to me – A Woman in the Ministry! My mind screams out to keep this life of mine perfect! But I know that I’ve learned over the years – perfection is self defeating. God can’t use perfection. It is unattainable. As I live my life openly and vulnerably, God can use my Crisis and pain to minister and heal others. God give me wisdom and humility to share with whom and when I need to share my life openly.
First things first, Break it down. I need to make a short list of my thoughts and actions, maybe attitudes & motives too. When I’ve been stressed and burdened with worry, I take it to the Lord. Read my Bible and pray. I actually feel a soothing of my emotions when I bathe myself in God’s word. As I bow down on my knees and talk to God, I gain confidence and peace. Wow, now that is some new perspective. I arrive on the scene, courageous & calm, wrapped in a blanket of strength, able to do things and say things I never thought possible.
Now it is time to put on some music! Time to worship God.
Sometimes to break out, I ask myself how can I get connected with others. How can I get involved in making life better for someone else? Look into fun groups, places in need of volunteers, fill your calendar with family, girlfriends and doing something you love to do.
II Corinthians 12:10 (Message) “It was a case of Christ’s strength moving in on my weaknesses. Now I take limitations in stride and with good cheer – these limitations that cut me down to size – abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over. And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become.”
Overcome
o·ver·come: 1. To defeat; conquer. 2. To prevail over; surmount. 3. To overpower, as with emotion.
Thirteen.
Three years.
The number of family members (not including friends) who have passed away in those few years. If you like math: 4 1/3 per year.
Overcome.
Defeat? Or prevail?
Everything in the human spirit would tend to give up. It does seem like we are dropping like flies. The shock of some of the circumstances causing the deaths could cause numbness. You’d think that a person would get used to it.
The recent death (two weeks today) of my uncle has stressed the importance of family and how to live. My little cousin said, “Why can’t God give Pap a phone so we can talk to him in heaven?” (Tears, even still!) The questions we would like to ask but dare not say!
This song that was sung today at First Assembly Beaver Falls (shout out to Pastor Poole ☺) really hit me. Tears streamed down my face as I sang:
You Hold Me Now (Hillsong United)
On that day when I see
All that You have for me
When I see You face to face
There surrounded by Your grace
All my fears swept away
In the light of Your embrace
Where Your love is all I need
And forever I am freePRE CHORUS 1:
Where the streets are made of gold
In Your presence healed and whole
Let the songs of heaven
Rise to You alone
CHORUS:
No weeping no hurt or pain
No suffering You hold me now
You hold me now
No darkness no sick or lame
No hiding You hold me now
You hold me now
VERSE 2:
In this life I will stand
Through my joy and my pain
Knowing there’s a greater day
There’s a hope that never fails
Where Your Name is lifted high
And forever praises rise
For the glory of Your Name
I’m believing for the day
PRE CHORUS 2:
Where the wars and violence cease
All creation lives in peace
Let the songs of heaven
Rise to You aloneBRIDGE:
For eternity
All my heart will give
All the glory to Your Name
Rev. 21:4 “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain…” We have this hope because the basis of the Christian faith is the knowledge that Jesus OVERCAME (DEFEATED; CONQUERED; PREVAIL(ED) (S) OVER) death!
There have been plenty of opportunities for those who have seen the tomb, those of history, that could disprove the validity of Jesus’ resurrection from the dead. Anyone who wanted to silence the “questions” could have produced a body. But they haven’t; no one has dared. They can’t! Praise God!
So many of my new friends are dealing with the tragic loss of two women of God (Gloria Budzowski and Sandra Bass-Palmer). In this sorrowful hour, where so many are grieving … we hold to the knowledge that He has overcome! Does this take away the moments of questions, of pain, of shock, of sorrow? No. It leaves us speechless. It does allow us the proper grieving process with the knowledge that Jesus has overcome all those feelings, and that He is there holding us as we pass through our trials.
My thought in Sharon Poole’s Sunday school class today as the prayer requests were mentioned was: If God’s a crutch, then That’s the Only Thing I want holding me up. My heart cries for all involved with/touched by the loss of these ladies. May we listen for the brush of angels wings as the tears are our silent prayers, remembering we have the Holy Spirit groaning when no words can be uttered! Romans 8:26 “… the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.”
SHINE (David Crowder Band)
Send me a sign
A hint, a whisper
Throw me a line
‘Cause I am listening
Come break the quiet
Breathe your awakening
Bring me to life
‘Cause I am fading(surround me with)
The rush of angels’ wings
Shine your light so I can see you
Pull me up I need to be near you
Hold me I need to feel love
Can you overcome this heart that’s overcome
You sent a sign
A hint, a whisper
Human divine
Heaven is listening
Death laid love quiet
Yet in the night a stirring
(all around)
The rush of angels
Shine your light so I can see you
Pull me up I need to be near you
Hold me I need to feel love
Can you overcome this heart that’s overcome
Oh the wonder of
The greatest love
Come for us
Oh the wonder of
The greatest love
Has come
Shine your light so all can see it
Lift it up cause the whole world needs it
Love’s come down what joy to hear it
He has overcome
He has overcome
May you find the peace and rest needed in knowing He has overcome!
Stand Out
Romans 12:2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
From the album The Lost Get Found
I remember when you were
So alive with your wide eyes
‘Til the light that you had when your heart was stolenNow you say that it ain’t worth stayin’
You wanna run but you’re hesitating
I’m talking to me Don’t let the lights go down
Don’t let your fire burn out
‘Cause somewhere somebody needs a reason to believe
Why don’t you rise up now
Don’t be afraid to stand out
That’s how the lost get found
The lost get found
So when you get the chance
Are you gonna take it?
There’s a really big world at your fingertips
And you know you have the chance to change it
There’s a girl on the street she’s crying
There’s a man whose faith is dying
Love is calling you
Why do we go with the flow?
Or take the easier road
Why are playing it safe?
Love came to show us the way
Love is a chance we should take I am moving out of the way
Don’t let the lights go down
Don’t let your fire burn out
‘Cause somewhere somebody needs a reason to believe
Why don’t you rise up now
Don’t be afraid to stand out
That’s how the lost get found
The lost get found
Burning
The coldest heart
The deepest wound
The endless dark
The lonely ache
The burning tears
The bitter nights
The wasted years Life breaks and falls apart
But we know these are
Places where grace is soon to be so amazing
It may be unfulfilled
It may be unrestored
But when anything that’s shattered is laid before the Lord
Just watch and see
It will not be unredeemed For every choice that led to shame
And all the love that never came
For every vow that someone broke
And every life that gave up hope
We live in the shadow of the fall
But the cross says these are all
Places where grace is soon to be so amazing
It may be unfulfilled
It may be unrestored
But when anything that’s shattered is laid before the Lord
Just watch and see
It will not be unredeemedPlaces where grace is soon to be so amazing
It may be unfulfilled
It may be unrestored
But you never know the miracle the Father has in store
Just watch and see
It will not be
Just watch and see
It will not be unredeemed
Trust and Obey
By Becky Thomas
Trust and Obey
This beloved hymn is resounding in my mind and heart. I have been, and have had others praying for the knowledge as to whether or not I should go on a mission trip to India in February. The song is my answer.
Trust and obey. I do not have trouble with the obeying. No, I have not always obeyed. However, it is not the most difficult of the two tasks. Trusting, yes, that is my stumbling block.
Numerous obstacles lie in the road to going to India February 8-18. I will not begin to list the pros and cons. You would tire of reading if I did. The list is lengthy. However, in the silence I have been forced to listen for His voice.
Now I am not going to say this is God speaking, it was just a way to help confirm what I should do. The question had been asked several times as to whether or not I would be going on this mission trip. To each question I answered, “I don’t know.” As my heart was heavy for India one day, I had a text message come through my cell phone. When I read it, I had to laugh. AT & T sent a text with the message: your phone is capable of sending and receiving international texts. HA! Well, well! There we go.
The will of God will be done. This I choose to trust. Because as it says in Psalm 13:5, His love is unfailing. That I have seen throughout my life.
So, as you walk the road that you are traveling, trust and obey. There truly is no better way!
Psalm 13:5-6 “But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the LORD, for he has been good to me.”
Not a burden we bear,
not a sorrow we share,
but our toil he doth richly repay;
not a grief or a loss,
not a frown or a cross,
but is blest if we trust and obey.
the delights of his love
until all on the altar we lay;
for the favor he shows,
for the joy he bestows,
are for them who will trust and obey. {John Henry Sammis}
But God!
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By Becky Thomas
” ‘But God!’ This is not what we expected. The surgery was a simple procedure. The recovery process should not be this way.” ” ‘But God!’ This is not how I planned my life. It seems to have gotten so out of control. I never would have imagined it would come to this.” ” ‘But God!’ This is a good work. It is for You. I don’t see why You wouldn’t want me to do this.” ” ‘But, God?’ I know You are there. ‘But, God?’ I don’t feel You near.” BUT GOD …
The circumstances of our lives may not always be as we would want. We do not always understand how the choices we make can lead us to such consequences. We thought what we were doing was what was best. How could it be this way? As I spent time at a girls retreat, I kept looking for evidence of the girls being receptive by their coming forward at the invitation. The atmosphere had been different than at the girls retreat the week prior. However, as things did not go as smoothly as planned, and the receptiveness did not seem evident, God had other plans. I was watching through my camera lens. When I stopped and paused, that was when I saw that the girls were touched. They had the tears streaming down their faces as proof. They did not go forward, “but God” had touched them where they were! I have come to the realization in my short years that there is always a “but God” to every situation. He is the judge; He will deliver; He will redeem; He is our strength; He is faithful. God may never be all that we would ever want, BUT GOD is enough. May you look at your current situation and say, “But God will see me through,” and know that “He’s All [you] Need”. He’s All I Need (Ken Bible)* He’s all I need He’s good to me He’s life and peace He’s all I need He satisfies My need supplies
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Raju, the Seed
The Rag pickers’ Slum is situated in the middle of Sangam Vihar(New Delhi, India) popularly known as the largest unauthorized colony of Asia, which is home for close to two million people. It is affected with all the problems related with poverty. Over 20% of the kids from Rag Pickers’ slum do not see their 5th birthday and every child burdened with doing something to help the family in their struggle for survival. With all these going on there were few children who were different. Raju was one among them, who was a part of the Hope Child Development Program.
Raju was one of the most cheerful children in the rag pickers slum, Sangam Vihar,
It was 11th May, 2008 Sunday morning at 8.00 that Raju started vomiting and as it was a Sunday, none of our field Staff visited that place as we were all busy with the church services. And because the Rag Pickers slum is about 2 miles form the church, there was no information for any of us. What made it even more difficult was that Raju was battling for life from 8am till 5.00 pm and Raju’s father was waiting for the contractor who normally buys the rags from the Rag Pickers. The entire money Raju’s father needed was just Rs.50 (little over a Dollar). Raju’s familyAs he did not have the money he was waiting for the contractor. As it was a holiday the contractor came only at 5.00.pm.As soon as he got the money, the father rushed to the hospital with the child to the nearby hospital. With all the rush, it took aver half an hour for the father to get the child to the hospital It was already too late and the doctors declared, Raju brought dead…
Only the next day we came to know about it and we rushed to the place and they have already cremated the child. And the mother also was food poisoned and she was not able to see the dead body of her only son Raju. As they were very poor, they even did never take a picture of Raju in the last 8 years of his life. The mother was weeping and sobbing as we reached there and she cried, I accept the fact that my son is dead, but I just want to see Raju one more time. Can you please show my son one more time??? We had no idea of taking Raju’s picture in the past.
In the month of April, the kids from the Rag Pickers’ slum came to the main center in Kalkaji. As they were leaving, Joicy my wife was led by the Holy Spirit to rush to the bus which was above to leave to get couple of pictures. And both the pictures she took were focusing on Raju. We developed that and gave to Raju’s mom who hugged that picture and cried like a little child. They still keep that picture so carefully and gazes at the same time to time.
Raju wanted to be the first one to study in the new building that was built and dedicated for the Rag pickers slum kids. His name was the first that was enrolled; But Raju had become the seed that many Rajus in the Rag Pickers’ slum can live. Now we have 300 kids registered with the Mission of Mercy and there are many hundreds of Rajus waiting to find hope and life through MOM in the midst poverty and death.
On behalf of the kids and their parents, we the
Not OK by Becky Thomas
Who came up with the idea that Christians had to be okay all the time? I have heard many solid Christians say, “…but, it’s okay,” or, “I’ll be okay. I have to be.” I’m sorry if what I am about to say offends anyone. You may e-mail or comment as you see fit.
You do NOT have to be okay. It is okay not to be okay. I responded to a friend who said she had to be okay with, “Lean on me. I have big shoulders.” To which we started singing the familiar song, Lean On Me. To another friend I said, “No, it isn’t okay. It stinks. [Ironic, since I was standing in the bathroom at that moment!] I’ll be your horrible friend, and admit to you how it really is.”
Friends, it is quite alright not to be okay. I am reminded of Moses … when he was not okay. He was worn out and could not keep his hands lifted to win the battle. My dear Christians, that is where we come into play. We need to admit we are not okay and let others set us down and hold up our hands. Exodus 17:11 As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. 12 When Moses’ hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up—one on one side, one on the other—so that his hands remained steady till sunset.
Oh, how we need to support our brothers and sisters in Christ by lifting them up when they are tired and worn from the battle. How we need to be willing to admit that we need an “Aaron and Hur” to keep the faith.
The faith is the knowledge that God is. He just is. Chonda Pierce, a Christian comedianne, wrote in her book Laughing In the Dark:
“One evening at sunset, I had a breakthrough. I sat quietly and watched the sun — a beautiful ball of orange fire — drop slowly into the ocean. … And as objectively as possible, I thought, That was beautiful. There was no song or swell of emotion that brought me to that conclusion. The sight of a fiery-orange sun disappearing into an endless expanse of blue sea is a thing of beauty — always has been, always will be. Some things can’t be denied, no matter how you feel.
“At that moment I realized that the presence of God is like the splendor of the set: It can’t be denied, no matter how you feel.”
Know that even if you are not okay, God is. We know this to be true, no matter how we feel. So, when death comes, when situations among fellow Christians attack, when the doctor gives the “bad news”, when the prayers feel as if they have hit a ceiling to come crashing down . . . know that He is. God loves you. This I know to be true.
Three Red Cardinals
Last year I dedicated time each week to read through Laurie Beth Jones’ book Jesus Life Coach and follow-up with the journal that accompanied it. I found each chapter to be thought provoking and heart searching. One lesson spoke about having a unique, one-on-one relationship with Jesus. A relationship so close that she had an understanding with God that when He was thinking of her, He would delight her with a ladybug. Her friend had an agreement with God about white butterflies. Someone else felt God’s warmth when she found a penny. She challenged us to consider what it is that makes us feel special and remembered by God. I thought of how Noah was given the rainbow by God as a reminder of His promise to him after the flood. It wasn’t long and a beautiful red cardinal balanced on a branch for me to admire. Yes, that was definitely my secret signal from God. As a child, I cherished a glass figurine of a pair of red cardinals. After making this journal entry, at times when I was experiencing the need for great faith, a red cardinal would appear and put on a show for me. This spring, one of my daughters was hospitalized in a critical care unit. Her health, her life and her future is in God’s hands. She has also faced challenges trying to adopt a child. As mothers, our hearts are moved with compassion for our children when they hurt. I was in prayer about this very matter, when three red cardinals lined up before me on our front lawn. I could hear God saying, “I see you. I love you. I’m here.” We are reminded that “God remembered Noah” (Gen. 8:1) and we are to “abide in His love” (John 15:10).
Simply Indescribable
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Simply Indescribable Okay. You totally had to have been there to get the full effect of this one. Try as I might, I want to give you a vision, a glimpse into what it was like. Here we go. On the go for a long weekend, the plan was to pick up my niece. The secretive plan did not reveal itself as my niece rode a great distance for me to “take her to eat”. A game developed from my secrecy as she tried to guess our destination. Her attention was held captive to our made-up game. A telephone call from my sister interrupted the game. Onward I drove. Suspense from the call and length of the trip got the best of my niece. Oh, no! What to do now? Ah, be funny. To divert my niece from asking difficult questions and as an attempt to be funny, I dried my teeth. (No, my dental hygienist’s status is not playing a factor here.) I dried my teeth and curled my lip to make it stick on my gums. As I turned to look at my niece, laughter ensued and a new game was invented. The game lasted for miles. Infectious laughter erupted like the fizz from a shaken soda-pop bottle. Tears streamed down my niece’s cheek as she said through her belly-laughter, “Your teeth look like a groundhog’s when you do that!” Minutes turned into an hour of genuine joy in such a simple act. The days leading to the trip gave bright, sunny, warm afternoons with the birds singing their praises. The trees waved their branches in worship to the day’s simple beauty. The clouds like that of soft cotton puffs spaced themselves to let the dazzling aquamarine sky shine more beautifully than any jewel. Amazing. Simply amazing. The beauty of God’s creations overwhelmed the senses. Knowing that God cared enough to arrange the symphony of a wonderful Spring day causes the finite mind to have difficulty grasping the simplicity of His love for us. Simple. Yet we often look for God in the big things: finances, healings, job situations, life, and death. We look for the miraculous when we can see Him in the simple things: contagious laughter, a sunrise, the sunset, the warmth of the day, the coolness of night. He simply is. Deut. 10:21 “He is your praise; he is your God, who performed for you those great and awesome wonders you saw with your own eyes.” Psalm 66:5 “Come and see what God has done, how awesome his works in man’s behalf!” Psalm 145:3-5 “Great is the LORD and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom. 4 One generation will commend your works to another; they will tell of your mighty acts. 5 They will speak of the glorious splendor of your majesty, and I will meditate on your wonderful works.” Psalm 119:129-130 “Your statutes are wonderful; therefore I obey them. 130 The unfolding of your words gives light; it gives understanding to the simple.” Although the delightful laughter and reflection came from the simple, the simple was used for understanding. The simple gave lightheartedness. The simple made God seen, revealed in all His splendor. Oh, to be able to describe the joy and wonder! It is Simply Indescribable. May God give you some simple act or vision to realize His awesome power and love today. Awestruck, Becky Indescribable (Avalon) From the highest of heights Indescribable, uncontainable Who has told every lightning bolt Indescribable, uncontainable Incomparable, unchangeable You see the depths of my heart And You love me the same You are amazing God You are amazing God |
